Getting locked out, back to school disco and being a lot more independant than I origionally anticipated Monday, Oct 1 2012 

1st by title and also my first issue today was that I got locked out of my bedroom…not my house, my bedroom! Basically, the doors we have for our bedrooms lock automatically if they are closed (like the typical front door), hence, when I tried to pop to the bathroom and the wind smashed my door shut I was left in the corridor (strangely our front door does not lock automatically and it needs to be locked on both leaving and entering the house). Anyway, this really annoyed me as I had a long list of things to do today. Also, I like to have some time by myself and I am not a fan of constantly being downstairs with housemates. I mean, of course they are lovely people but a person needs their space you know. Anyway, I called the landlord and he said he would be over within the hour, he then rang back to say he would be there in seven whole hours! Finally, that time has arrived, well, he was late, but luckily I have finally got into my room and am so damn happy!

I also can’t wait to go out tonight, I love the ‘back to school’ disco theme where everyone dresses up in school uniform! Also, I am quite intrigued to see what it’s going to be like, I mean, it’s a freshers event where everyone is essentially desperately trying to make friends, being a happy second year is going to be quite nice…this does in no way mean I am not going to get absolutely off the handle drunk!

Lastly, I feel very content and happy with myself. I thought I’d be a wreck being away from my boyfriend after living with him all summer- however, I am thoroughly enjoying the company of others, my own space and life in general! This makes me feel really good about myself as it is always nice to know that although you love someone you are able to function without them. I think it’s also quite healthy that we have this week apart with our friends and getting back into the swing of things…this does in no way mean I am not crazy excited about seeing him on the weekend!

Grace x

Why is that? Why is it that you’re fine by yourself but after a relationship yourself just isn’t enough anymore? Tuesday, Sep 25 2012 

You’re fine and you’re happy, things are going right,

You’re self-sufficient intelligent and bright.

He comes along and you think, yes wow,

Things really are going my way now.

The days go on, the months, the years,

It’s subtle at first and you don’t ever realize.

Then one day he’s gone, bish bash, bagoon!

That’s when you realize how much you’re world changed, how much you’ve changed. You realize he became the glue that held you together, you got used to this glue, and even though you have the same job and everything else in your life is great, somehow it’s harder and different, you can’t keep yourself together anymore.

Why is that?

Grace x

I want something… Sunday, Sep 16 2012 

I don’t know what I want this evening. I want my boyfriend here. I know it’s pathetic that I miss him when he’s gone to his dads for only a day but I do.

The bed feels massive even though it’s a single

Most of my friends have gone off to university so there really isn’t much to do.

Do I want food?

Do I want to watch something? Read something? Take a bath?

I doubt I’m going to figure it out; so for now, I’m going to the shops for cigarettes. God I wish I didn’t smoke so this would be a treat.

I want to tidy up but I don’t have the energy.

I want to go to sleep but I’m not that tired.

Why the fuck am I upset? Everything’s fucking fine.

Grace x

Arguments, meddling friends and a fuck load of alcohol! Saturday, Sep 1 2012 

So, yesterday I was all moaning about going to the pub because I was so tired. Maybe I shouldn’t have gone. My boyfriend showed up completely wasted and off his head and we ended up arguing about the whole thing that happened with Satan earlier that day (see last post). However, as he was so bloody drunk he went from apologetic to just plain dickhead.

Naturally, Judas (https://overthinkingmind.wordpress.com/2012/08/26/oh-my-god/, basically gets involved in bloody everything to do with me and my boyfriend) got involved yet again. When I decided to walk home by myself she began shouting at me that I was ‘ruining everyone else’s night’! The thing is, how would me staying and arguing with my boyfriend not ruin everyone else’s night? How boring is she to say that if I leave her night will be shit? Don’t play the ‘you’re worried’ card- I live about five minutes away!

Anyway, I found my boyfriend and we talked and talked and he began to sober up and things were actually pretty okay. However, apparently our friends don’t understand when we need some alone time to talk about our problems and sort stuff out- just the two of us. Without them standing over our shoulder; without them intercepting into the argument and without them pretending to be councillors! I definitely think the argument got way more out of hand because people started to get involved!

In the morning I was woken up with sex so that was pretty awesome. It was really hot too, I mean, since the whole hand incident he hasn’t really made much effort. Today he just threw me down and decided to fuck me- seriously hot stuff. We found two new positions from rolling around too! A new fingering/ tossing off one as well!

After we talked and he apologised for being a drunk douche. He’s gone to football now before I see him this evening. I’m happy 🙂

By the way: I’m going camping on Monday! I have never been camping (well, unless festivals count), I’m rather excited. Judas will be there but who cares! I’ll try to sneakily post little tibits, do not know how I’m going to tear myself away from proper blogging from Monday to Wednesday!

Out again tonight, bar crawl!

Grace x

I’m quite excited Sunday, Aug 26 2012 

I love having the house to myself ever now and then, I can watch crap television without being pestered by my boyfriend, cook up odd concoctions without running the risk of killing him and sit around doing nothing without thinking I’m being really anti-social. He’s at his dad’s tonight and I may have told him I’ll get the house in order…this is not going to happen. Maybe tomorrow. 

I can also play pokemon!

I am also so excited about picking up my little brother, can’t believe I haven’t seen him in a whole month! The money I’m getting from my grandparents is also a much welcome treat!

I shall be dancing around in my underwear to the best of the 2000’s while smoking and drinking wine! Tonight is going to be a good night!

I can also blog all I like, go to sleep when I like and bathe for hours on end! I quite fancy dyeing my hair too, one of those wash in wash out perhaps? I mean, it took me months and months to go blonde (I’m naturally brunette and am too terrified to bleach my hair so I just dyed it repeatedly) so I don’t really want to dye it anything permanent as I cannot bare to go through that process again!

I also love the London underground, which is what I shall be taking back home from Heathrow!

A game that I used to play ( and sometimes still do) is to look at one person in turn on your carriage and think what you would want to have that is theirs. This can range from a cute top, nice eye colour or awesome shoes to things like being married, having kids or being really graceful. Give it a go, it makes the journey way more fun!

Grace x

Writing Challenge: Smoking made it happen, Smoking makes her forget Sunday, Aug 26 2012 

Today I stumbled across a wonderful site: http://oursalon.wordpress.com/ where a challenge was given to write a poem, dialogue or story about a picture in no more or less than six sentences while using the picture given as inspiration. Here’s my attempt!

Image

The baby was crying; the baby was 12.

‘Don’t smoke pregnant’ they’d said.

She ignored them- She knew people who had.

This burden wasn’t on them however, she was the one carrying the curse.

Her partner had left, it was all too much for him, she still wore the ring.

Sitting alone she wondered, where did she get it so wrong.

Grace x