“What makes your problems bigger than everyone elses?” “They’re mine.” Tuesday, Oct 2 2012 

Yet another brilliant quote from Ally McBeal, that show should really be given for bloggers with writer’s block to watch! Anyway, this quote got me thinking…I mean, essentially, if you think about it, all the problems anyone who is reading this (and hence can get to a computer with an internet connection) really has no problems whatsoever in comparison to about 70% of the world’s population who have real problems, you know, hunger, homelessness ect. Now, even thinking about this it does make so many problems seem pointless and stupid, I mean, I worry about my boyfriend breaking up with me when there are people worrying if their children will come back from digging in gutters for food or plastic to sell. Perspective aye.

On the other hand, I do also believe that everyone’s problems are relative, I mean, for some it’s poverty and for others it’s being rejected for a promotion. I know the two are in no way similar in terms of severity but I do believe that for those who haven’t experienced true problems something like the lack of a promotion could feel like the biggest problem in the world. Essentially, feelings are relative and the thing is, you are the center of your world, hence, I think, your problems do of course seem like something absolutely tragic is happening to you. I think the reality is that you know that your problems aren’t that big in the lager sense of things but because they are yours and are happening to you, do seem like world problems every time.

Well, that’s just my opinion? What does everyone else think about the topic of problems and relativity?

Grace x

Age of consent Saturday, Sep 22 2012 

I have been reading quite a lot on this topic as discussions approach about the UK changing its age of consent from 16 to 14. This topic got me thinking about the age of consent in other countries and how laws may differ worldwide.

I found the website http://www.avert.org/age-of-consent.htm very helpful in my search for worldwide age of consent laws as it literally listed basically every country, their age of consent or if they did not have one. I found that the age of consent worldwide ranges from 12 to 21. This is a difference of nine years which in itself seems rather huge; however, when you consider the massive changes which occur to a person within these nine years the gap seems even larger.

Now, in terms of these ages I think that 12 is an absolutely shocking age to be having sex at. I mean, seriously, people having sex at 12!? I didn’t even so much as kiss a boy until I was 14 and even that was a fucking dare and lasted about a millisecond! It cannot possibly be healthy in any way to begin having sex at 12, I mean, I wasn’t even trusted to go out past about 7 so how on earth could I be trusted to make such an important decision as loosing my virginity. I genuinely think that at 12 you are a child and cannot at all comprehend and understand how to make this kind of decision. Also, at 12 you will not realistically have any strong and lasting feelings for someone you are going to have sex with and sleeping with people you don’t see yourself being with is a much more grown up and complicated issue than something you can deal with at the age of 12!

Whilst on the subject of this ridiculously low age of consent I would also like to make the comment that in Columbia the age of consent is 12 only for girls, yet boys can only have sex at 14. What does this mean? Who would these 12 year old girls be having sex with, boys at least two years older than them (which at that age is a huge age gap)? is it suggesting that girls are more responsible? I really don’t know what to make of this. The only conclusion I can really come to is that in many underdeveloped countries (such as Guatemala and Indonesia- which both also have different ages of consent for boys and girls [Guatemala: 14 for girls and 16 for boys. Indonesia: 16 for girls and 19 for boys], girls are typically expected to get married very early and to an older man who can help provide for her family. Either way, I am completely dumbfounded by this discovery.

On another note, I leant that in some countries the age of consent is only valid if you are married, an example of this is Bahrain which has its age of consent at 15 or the time of marriage. 15, to me personally, also seems to be a very low age to loose ones virginity. Also, the implication that it can be earlier if you marry earlier seems rather scary and filled with images of young girls being married of older men.

However, although I am, to an extent, stating that these ages of consent seem far too low I also discovered some rather unrealistic ideals. For example, may countries state that they simply do not allow sex before marriage, for example: Saudi Arabia and Qatar. Now, whilst I am not going to be a virgin when I get married this does seem to be a lovely idea and I think that if it was upheld by personal desires rather than religious stigma it would be an amazing thing to do. Nevertheless, although these countries are obviously rich in religious views it does seem to be rather idealistic and unrealistic to expect only the married to have sex. I also think it is rather ridiculous to punish consenting adults for having sex simply because they are not married. Personally, in the words of Samantha Jones (‘Sex and the City’ and yes, I know this isn’t exactly the intellectual quote I should be putting in this post): “Before you buy the car, you take it for a test drive!” This, I believe is completely true, both with sex and with living together!

Additionally, countries with the age of consent at the high age of 21, such as Cameroon, also seem rather unfathomable. I mean, yes, I agree that people should wait but I also think that if the age of consent is unrealistically high people will simply ignore it as ‘just one of those laws’, you know, the ones that are there but no one really listens to.

In conclusion, I believe that the age of consent is definitely a very difficult thing to determine: set too low it gives the impression that children having sex is promoted (‘Brave New World’ anyone?), set it too high and it will not be something that people even try to aspire to. The thing is, I do think that essentially it is not the age that a person has sex at that really matters, it’s the reasons why they are having sex. Of course, this does not mean that 12 year olds ‘in love’ should be having sex, I just simply mean that I think that some people mature earlier than others and for some sex at 16 will be the right thing whereas for others the right thing to do will be to wait until 20, 25 or even marriage. At the end of the day, to each is own (apart from 12 year old’s ‘in love’).

Personally, I think that below 16 is a ridiculous age to have sex but that waiting till after marriage is not going to do you any favors as sex is a large part of your relationship with someone.

I would genuinely love any input that anyone has on this matter whatever your views may be.

Grace x

Wasting the night away Friday, Aug 31 2012 

I have just spent probably over an hour trying to make my blog just how I would like it, for those of you who’ve seen it before: I NOW EVEN HAVE CATEGORIES! How very official of me!

The thing is, today I realised my blogs vary quite a lot. I mean, first I blab on about my boyfriend’s broken phone, then I’m all up in yah grill about Akin and disability rights; this is the main reason for the categories to be quite honest. I’m also hoping this category business will promote me to write about important issues which I am interested in and have researched more often. The categories mean that my well written posts aren’t going to be swinging about with the likes of me cooing about my gecko and there will actually be some continuity within the posts about my daily life. How exciting!

So, for those of you who are aware of my all night steak out: it is going well, I (obviously) still have not succumbed to sleep. I have, however, probably eaten my body weight in crap just to get through the night. I expect a very happy boyfriend in the morning; although, to be honest I don’t expect to appreciate it too much due to my exhaustion.

Before I peace-out to read some more blogs (I have found some fantastic stuff tonight by the way! I really need to sort out the widget that says where I’ve commented so more people can see these great blogs) I just want to say that the so called ‘important category’ will not always be full of political debate and wise words, some will just be posts I think are important to me or posts that I think I’ve written well. My musing category can then be free for me to detail my daily life, escapades, my imminent return to university, friends, rants and the goings on between me and the boyfriend (not that these aren’t important, but they’re hardly world events and I quite enjoy the odd, not perfectly punctuated, rant, swoon or antidote.

Last random post I throw in the important file I promise! Just wanted to let yaall know what was happening with this category business. The things in the ‘beyond ramblings’ category are basically things which I have something to say on: ranging from Facebook to the current government, from poetry to important life events (don’t worry, the life stuff will be in the ‘Day-to-Day’ file too).

Grace x

The Paraolympics Sunday, Aug 26 2012 

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As many of you will know the Paraolympics will be being held in London between 29th August and 9th September. Now, I am all for the Paraolympics, however, I do not think that the sporting activities that will be happening are being given due credit at all. Mainly, these thoughts derive from the following two reasons:

1) Why was the Olympic finishing ceremony held and why was the Olympic torch extinguished? I thought that these sports were meant to be part of the Olympics, not the chocolate you get with your bill after the main course.

2) Why is there less hype about these sports? These are obviously much more accomplished athletes than those who are in no was disabled.

I believe that the Paraolympics should be much more integrated into the Olympics, there should be a closing ceremony after ALL the events have been completed, and if not, the Paraolympics should at least have their own opening and closing ceremonies (which, actually, isn’t that good either as this separates the games more). There also needs to be more on the news about the Paraolympics, these amazing people should be receiving the same treatment, endorsement deals and attention as those who have not faced such life difficulties!

Grace x

Congressman Akin Thursday, Aug 23 2012 

I’ve been seeing a lot about about this man floating about the internet recently and today decided to actually read into it.

I am horrified.

According to this charming gentleman, if you are able to conceive during a rape attack, it is not actually rape, it is consensual. This is interesting as I was not aware that all rapists were reproductively challenged and also assumed that when women are raped they do not know it is going to happen so would rarely be protected from pregnancy. Apparently, I am wrong and ‘legitimate’ rape cannot cause pregnancy.

Now, on top of all this rubbish Akin also states that because rape is a violent encounter the woman’s body would shut down. This is interesting because I do believe many couples have quite rough sex (obviously this cannot be compared to rape but just hear me out), so does that mean that as long as my boyfriend pounds me hard enough we no longer need to worry about contraception?

Although all his words seem like complete crap it does seem that some people are listening, and no, not even the men, women too! In an article I read I was informed about a woman, Martha Byars, who was recently raped and fell pregnant. After listening to Akin she is now convinced that she was in fact not raped and has told police and reporters that she will not be pressing charges because, as she got pregnant, the rape must have been consensual.

This demonstrates how detrimental how detrimental Akin is to society. Rape convictions are already extremely low with estimates that only 1 in 100 rape victims are able to convict their attacker, with Britain being reported as having the lowest rape convictions out of 33 examined countries. For this reason it is clear that people like Akin are not needed in society and that all rape cases should be examined properly and the 26% of American’s who believe that rape is at least in some way, if not completely, the woman’s fault need to converted.

Grace x

30 day meme: My last post nearly made me loose my mind Wednesday, Aug 22 2012 

24. Your favourite movie and what it’s about.
I think this one is actually very difficult because I’ve watched movies from a very early age and me and my boyfriend absolutely love watching movies now so it is going to be hard to decide. I’m putting more than one, I simply cannot choose
-Limitless: Amazing
-Saw (all of them): Horror movies with a message, especially good when they relate to current events (for example, the latest saw where insurance company workers and bankers and targeted)
The Lorax: Saw it with my little brother, a children’s movie in which I cried an amazon rainfall about the values of the environment
– Lion King: Wow, although, when I was little my nan convinced me Mufasa wasn’t dead but was just ‘a bit hurt and resting’
– The Notebook: I know every word of that movie
– Never Let Me Go: Beautiful film involving growing children for their organs
OKAY! I need to stop!
25. Someone who fascinates you and why.
My boyfriend (cringy I know): He is so kind, funny, frustrating and so many other things. I will never forget how amazing he was as a friend when I was having so many troubles with my ex. An example: One night I was chilling at his and me and my boyfriend got into a texting argument, I started crying and he let me cry on me, comforted me, then, when I said I had to go see him said he would walk behind me and keep an eye on me from the distance to make sure I was okay. He’s also beat him up which was just wow. He is amazing and puts up with me now and makes me happy everyday, literally, everyday.
26. What kind of men attracts you?
The thing is, I don’t really know. I mean, I’m usually in a long-term relationship, therefore haven’t really had the experience of being attracted towards many different men. I would say I don’t really have a specific type. My ex was clingy, jealous, very up front with emotions, bit of weight around the tummy. My boyfriend now, I mean, I didn’t think he was even capable of showing up front emotion for a while, he’s athletic and trusting. My main thing about guys is they need to be sweet once we are serious.
27. What problem did you have?
I do not fully understand this question. When? In terms of what? Well I would say I’m not troubled by anything at the moment really, except for my boyfriend’s arm injury. I think the problems I’ve had recently are silly and quite rare spats with my boyfriend about silly things like the dishes. His arm injury was a major problem when it happened but after his operation I feel so much better. I guess, not getting into the uni’s I choose last year was rough, but I still got into an amazing one through clearing. I’m not really sure. I guess I am quite a freakishly happy person though