I don’t feel like he really wants me around I mean, sure, he’ll say I’m welcome, he won’t say no to me coming but he won’t explicitly ask me to come. It’s getting to the point where it’s a bit ridiculous now. He seems perfectly content not to see me for two weeks and, since it will be the Easter break then, it will only really be with other people except for night time.

I just want him to be the one ringing me and asking me to come over, the one who sits wondering what he’s doing. I can’t even really talk to him as it always turns into an argument and he just doesn’t understand at all- he’s felt needed and wanted everyday for over two years. I’m not sure what percentage of that can be said for me; but it’s not high.

I want to go see him today, and I know I can, but now we’re in a bad mood with each other and the pub is looking like a much more fun option.

The reception cut out while we were arguing on the phone and he still hasn’t rang back- who am I kidding, I’m clearly going to be the one that rings him, my resolve is pathetic.

I wonder what it’s like to be wanted everyday.

Grace

x